It's now or never

Yesterday was the day. No, I didn't forget about it. In fact, I had long anticipated for the day to come. As early as last week, I even already had in mind the piece I wanted to post on that day. I finished writing it the night before yesterday and even published the entry early dawn for the sake of wanting to see the look of it when posted. But as soon as I woke up in the morning, I removed it right away because it just didn't feel right. I did not delete it though; I saved it as a draft thinking that I may get the urge to post it later on. I was tired, bored and sleepy. I was wet and cold because of the damn weather. But never did I feel heavyhearted, melodramatic, depressed, emotional, etc. And the need to post it never came.

Does it mean I'm okay now? Or just in denial? Or, maybe I have lost the ability to feel (nahh ... that's impossible for someone like me who is such a feeling person). I also don't think it's indifference coz if it is then I wouldn't have made this entry. Well, whatever it means, one thing I'm sure of is that aside from being the birthday of a dear friend, yesterday was just an ordinary day for me. =)